The Overthinking Brain

"Every moment think steadily as a Roman and a man to do what thou hast in hand with perfect and simple dignity, and feeling of affection, and freedom, and justice; and to give thyself relief from all other thoughts." - Marcus Aurelius

The time is around 1am and you woke up from bed from fear or anxiety when you thought about a situation that happened years ago or, even worse, that didn't happen at all. 

If that is you, then we are no different. For many years, overthinking has become a struggle for me to cope with. A lot of energy is wasted on thinking upon what would happen instead of just living in the moment. You know what i mean, don't you? 

Although, i have experienced a lot of setbacks from this toxic habit of mine, I have managed to find an alternative, which helps me to control them. But, first, let's think about this even longer (Hope you get the pun.....).

For me, personally, I get overthinking when i have an unfinished work, or a place where i don't feel comfortable or in an awkward situation. By experience, i can tell, it is not pleasant. You lose the precious moment of life which you cannot get it back.

Now, what does this do to your mental psyche? You may indulge in Negative self-talk, be easily distracted and hard to focus, fatigue, among many others. 

It is easy to identify when you do lose control of the train of thought. These are some of the common signs you are stuck in a spiral.

• Replaying past events or creating new ones
• Asking too many what if.
• Procrastination
• Self talk

But, now the question arises, what makes us overthinking?

There are actually a lot of answers for that one. 

One of them is, Validation. As we spoke about it in the previous blog. The constant need to gain approval from others. You tend to think a lot about that one costume. 

Do i fit in this? Do i look good? OMG, why is that person staring at me? 

In reality, the person might not even be noticing you. Now, my personal theory, is that the need for validation, comes from insecurity. Insecurity comes from the void in you. Well, then how do you fill the void? I will get there.

Perfectionism. Another inducer for the effect. Trying to eliminate errors or any potential for chaos. For example, you might be hosting a party. You brain starts to find the imperfections in your plan.

Do i have enough soda? Should i buy more chips? And on and on.

All it takes is one thought. The rest is the domino effect. But, that is not a problem. There are a set of solutions, that can help us prevent this altogether.

Missed Opportunities. Yep. You read that right. Overthinking make it harder to come to a conclusion. You may have a job offer at your hand. But, you end up thinking a lot, should i take this job? And by the time you reply, the position is taken by someone else because you just took enough time.

Oh, and maybe, you may like that girl or that man. You never end up talking to them. What's the reason? Over..............wait for it...........Thinking. (Need to slow down on HIMYM..).

We have been talking quite a lot about what happens and why it happens. Let's now talk how we can prevent them and filling up the void.

Hobbies or activities you may enjoy. For me personally, it is writing. Which is why i am enjoying writing this blog here, knowing it may help you guys someday. 

Finding something you may enjoy, could you working out, or watching your favorite movie. You Pick!!

We must avoid being empty. Do something. Stop being idle. This is something i am telling from experience. When you are idle, you automatically start to think. 

So, get your body and the mind moving. Keep it occupied. 

Socialize. Meet your friends and family. Text that friend or your family member. 

Take them out for a movie, to a beach, something that is enjoyable. Create positive memories.

Now, if you find yourself, you now know what to do.

I hope this blog found helpful to you. If you too overthink, let me know in the comments about your coping strategies or how you overcame it. And, if you have any suggestions for a topic, I will be happy to talk about it in my next blog,

See you again soon, buddy!!